Impact that crosses oceans: How care at WRHN shaped early fatherhood for an Irish couple
Patient Story
When James and Patrick thought about welcoming their first child into the world, they imagined a “Lion King moment” – like Rafiki lifting Simba high over Pride Rock as the other animals cheered.
What they got instead was less Disney magic and more suspense and uncertainty as unexpected complications led their surrogate into labour eight weeks early.
“You have this imagery in your head of being present for the birth and having the doctor hand you your son for the first time,” James says. "But with the way things happend, we didn't get that moment."
Our thoughts immediately shifted to worry and concern for Fionn.
James and Patrick, an Irish couple living more than 5,000 kilometres away from Kitchener-Waterloo, weren’t yet in town when Fionn was born.
Once the pair got word that their surrogate had been sent to Waterloo Regional Health Network (WRHN) with high blood pressure, they dropped everything and headed to Canada.
Meeting Fionn
Fionn, born at five pounds, was in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) at WRHN @ Midtown when his fathers arrived. He stayed there for the next 30 days as his tiny body grew and developed in an incubator.
“We had seen a picture of him on the plane and he looked healthy,” Patrick says. “Then you walk in and you’re hit by the incubator and the tubes and you realize – our baby is sick and we’re not getting out of here quickly.”
Not knowing what to do, James and Patrick turned to the NICU nurses for guidance. Soon, they got into a rhythm, taking turns holding Fionn for hours at a time to establish their bond.
As the days progressed, James and Patrick grew more confident in themselves and in Fionn’s resilience. Each night, when they left the Hospital to sleep in a nearby rented apartment, they trusted Fionn was in good hands.
And with each passing day, Fionn grew stronger because of the care he received.
“Those NICU nurses, they are angels,” James says.
They made us feel like we were family – like Fionn was one of their own.
It takes a village – and generosity
From the incubator that housed him, to the breast milk that nourished him, community donations played a big role in baby Fionn’s early days.
When James and Patrick returned to Ireland, they planted a tree in honour of the women that helped Fionn through his NICU journey.
“We think about our surrogate and the NICU nurses, and we are thankful for them every day,” Patrick says. “But we also know there are a number of women that made a big impact by donating their breast milk. We will never get to meet them or thank them for all they did.”
It didn't take long for James and Patrick to adjust to the fun side of fatherhood.
As avid travellers, the couple have already taken Fionn on several vacations – including a recent trip to Paris where they got engaged.
Someday soon, they’ll bring Fionn back to Kitchener-Waterloo to show him where he was born and introduce him to some of the NICU nurses who helped him through his first month.
“For 30 days, we had medical professionals beside us, caring for Fionn and teaching us how to care for him,” James says as a happy Fionn bounces on Patrick’s lap.
When you go through that, you form relationships that last a lifetime.
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